forbearing vs. immoderate
forbearing (adjective/verb) – being patient or practicing self-control when subjected to annoyance or provocation; refraining or holding back appropriately
immoderate (adjective) – not moderate; exceeding just or reasonable limits; excessive; extreme; intemperate; without bounds
Be forbearing one with another and set not your affections on things below. Pride not yourselves in your glory, and be not ashamed of abasement.
-Baha’u’llah
All things in moderation. I would argue almost all things in moderation. Some things are best left unconsumed or untouched. Take my word for it, or find out for yourself; it is up to you to appropriately moderate yourself. How is your current level of self-moderation? I know how bad mine has been at points in the past. I recently heard people older than me discussing how incapable they felt they were at appropriately self-moderating. They said it so confidently like it was an immovable fact, like they could never acquire such healthy moderation. It was honestly a saddening moment for me to listen to because I personally know that it is possible. I used to speak very similar words. It is not easy, but it is worth it.
Developing healthy temperance requires effortful commitment to your own well-being. Are you willing to take more control of your choices in more moments? Are you willing to abandon some of the chaos that you currently blame for your oversights? More conscious presence leads to more control of what you do and what you do not do. Can you better monitor and moderate your thoughts to minimize distractions to stay here and now more?
Every soul, the philosopher says, is involuntarily deprived of truth; consequently in the same way it is deprived of justice and temperance and benevolence and everything of the kind. It is most necessary to bear this constantly in mind, for then you will be more gentle towards all.
-Marcus Aurelius
I wonder how true the following statement is: the more immoderate your thoughts are, the more immoderate your actions are. If your brain is going here, there, and everywhere with endless trains of thoughts, then it is not too surprising that your actions become mindless. You are so distractedly mindful (not in a good way) with the running internal dialogue that you later blame a false idea that you cannot change when reflecting on whatever mindless actions may now fill you with guilt, shame, or some other low emotion. Learn and practice temperance with your thoughts in order to temper your own mood and actions. Perhaps that is the appropriate progression along this path of perception and performance. Everything builds from the inside out. Rather than blaming something untrue, sit down and shine the light back on you. Be forbearing with yourself as well as with others. I imagine we could all benefit from some more grace and patience each and every day. What a world if we could all be so kind as to bestow that upon one another as best and often as we can. Perhaps then I can cease so many sugjestions.
Moderation is key.
-Ryan Holiday
Don’t overdo anything.
Balance.
Soften.
Enjoy.
Each of our lanes should be bound by guardrails to safeguard us all from one another. We share Earth; we should temper ourselves for our own sake as well as for all others.
Maybe it is wise. Maybe it is dumb. Time will tell.